By Jessica Reed
Editor's Note: Parenting is hard, no matter which way you look at it. In this follow-up piece, however, Jessica points out in no particular order a few items for which we might embrace some advantages as blind parents.
10. When changing a poopy diaper you don’t have to see it.
9. When littles are sleeping, you can still sneak into their bedroom to grab things without turning on a light and unleashing the monster of a woken child.
8. While at a playground, instead of half paying attention to our kids while sitting on the side staring at Facebook on our phones and raging with jealousy over all the ridiculously perfect friends who’s lives seem so much more glamorous, we are the parent climbing the play structure. We are the one’s just making giggly memories to last a lifetime.
7. As stay at home parents, we need to get out and get our children out or we go nuts! When joining support groups (such as MOMS and MOPS) we may need rides to specific events. These are fantastic opportunities to cultivate one-on-one friendships with fellow moms who just get how hard being a stay at home parent can be.
6. In my experience there are two types of parents. There are those types of parents who want to do nothing but talk about their children, and then there are those types of parents who want to do anything but talk about their children. The first group will detail their birthing stories all the way up to how little Susie picked her nose for the first time! The second category of parents love their children and would do anything and everything for them but admit they need a mental break! Yes I am Mama, and I love it, but I’m also Jessica! In parenting groups, whether we like it or not, blindness is something that tangibly separates us from fellow parents. In my experience, Mom’s tend to view this perceived vulnerability as a gateway to connect.
5. Like many things with blindness, there are a number of alternative techniques when it comes to parenting. Whether it’s finding rides, using public transportation, reading to our children in braille, or organizing in a specific way, we are inadvertently teaching our children to think outside the box. There is often more than one way to skin a cat.
4. I have read that children with blind parents become more verbal and descriptive sooner than those with sighted parents. I don’t know if this is true, but my four-year-old daughter has known her right and left since she was three. I never sat down and specifically taught her, but she has often heard others providing me directions while we are walking. At four-and-a-half she has begun describing things around us in new environments… whether I want her to or not.
3. Whether we choose to acknowledge it, our children grow up seeing our differences and struggles. They are born into an idea that life is not always easy. There is struggle. It is how you choose to handle struggle that counts.
2. Studies have shown that children with parents with disabilities tend to grow up to be more compassionate and empathetic people. They are already born into “different.” I take this to mean that our children will be less likely to be afraid of difference, and more likely to befriend those that society segregates and dismisses.
1. Parents who belong to the National Federation of the Blind can raise their children as part of a large and supportive network. You don’t have to belong to the NFB to be a successful blind parent, but the organization does a great job of reminding us we do not have to face this alone.